


He's Not Dead, He Only Looks That Way

by novocainechild



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Adult Content, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe, Emotional Baggage, Friends to Lovers, Heartbreak, Homophobia, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Secret Relationship, Trauma
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-01
Updated: 2019-04-01
Packaged: 2019-12-30 07:32:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18311054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/novocainechild/pseuds/novocainechild
Summary: When Frank Iero meets a shy, mysterious, and undeniably beautiful man named Gerard Way during his bartending shift, he can't help but shoot his shot. But the problem is, there's much more to Gerard than what meets the eye. Gerard uses dangerous methods to cope with trauma and secrets, and both him and Frank know if he doesn't stop,  he could get himself killed. Will Frank be able to help Gerard through his issues, or will it be too much for him?





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This story has been swimming through my mind for a while now, and after contemplating it for way too long, I decided to just take the plunge and see what happens. Always looking to better my writing, so any constructive criticism is welcome! This is just for fun, and I in no way claim ownership and/or rights to My Chemical Romance or the members, and this story is purely fictional.  
> any mistakes, i apologize, but i think i got them all! :D

.......................................

"You motherfucker," Frank spat in disgust. He squinted his eyes at the boy in front of him, not believing the confession he'd just been told.

"I didn't mean to sleep with them," Gerard whimpered. His gaze fell the floor with shame.

"What do you mean you didn't mean to?! What, did you trip, fall, and land on his dick? That's not how it fucking works Gerard! So quit always trying to play the goddamn victim in every fucking situation!" Frank was hurting his own ears with the volume of his voice, but he didn't care to lower it. Gerard's ears deserved to hurt. Tears began to well in Gerard's eyes. Yes, Frank thought, Cry. Cry all you want, and then some, because we all know you only cry for the attention. You relish in other people's sympathy and pity, he thought bitterly, And I'm not going to give you the kind of attention you want.

"Please, Frank, just let me explain-"

"No!"

"You can't just not give me a chance to explain things!"

"Yes I can, because I know all you're gonna do is conjure up some bullshit sob story in an attempt to make me feel sympathy for you instead of the anger you deserve! It makes me sick!"

Gerard slowly backed into a doorway, trembling as he began to softly cry.

"Why are you doing this to me?" he asked through tears.

"Why are you doing this to ME?" Frank retorted, desperation clear in his voice.

That's when Frank lost it.

He picked up the nearest object, which just so happened to be an old metal stapler, and, without thinking, threw it in Gerard's direction. It hit Gerard straight on. He had only intended to scare him, but he had dodged it the wrong way, and was hit point blank in the head.

Gerard immediately lost consciousness and fell backward to the floor, hitting his head on the doorframe on the way down.

His stomach dropped at the sudden realization of what he had done.

"Oh my God," he breathed, his voice shaking,"What the fuck have I done?"

Mikey really was gonna kill him this time...


	2. INCOMPLETE/IN PROGRESS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ATTENTION EVERYONE:::: due to my complicated updating situation, i can't save drafts on my device. so what i have updated today is NOT chapter 1, it is just me saving what i've written so i can keep adding to it and eventually properly post it. if that makes any sense at all. so, you can read this short draft if you want, but it isnt a completed proper chapter. bear with me guys, it might get better soon. :)

Sleeping with seedy old men for money wasn't exactly how Gerard Way would have ideally liked to spend his birthday, but when your deadbeat, poor-excuse-for-a-father refuses to get a job, you do what you gotta do to survive.

Gerard was seated on his bathroom countertop applying his eye makeup. He always did-up his face when preparing to "go out" (he would use that term instead of "prostitution" so he wouldn't let his dad in on his secret). Sultry eye makeup and lipgloss were crucial to getting the most customer traffic. He learned that in this industry, the more effeminate you are, the higher your demand is, and a high demand is how you get the big bucks. And by 'big bucks', he meant enough money to buy lunch and dinner for himself. He tried not to let his thoughts get too caught up about his dad. He'd have to deal with homophobic slurs fired at him by his father as soon as he left the bathroom anyway; he wasn't going to rush it.

Seventeen. It was Gerard's seventeenth birthday that day. He felt a little odd thinking about it; you're still supposed to be innocent and carefree at seventeen, and here he was, in a situation where he was whoring himself out to survive. Crazy how life comes at you fast. 

He finished with his makeup, not bothering to make it perfect as there was a zero percent chance it wouldn't get smudged by one of his clients later. He hurriedly shuffled his cosmetic bag together (for touch ups!) and headed to his room for his jacket and boots. Gerard softly crept down the staircase, making a beeline toward the side door as to leave without being noticed by his dad. Of course, it didn't work. It never did. 

"What the fuck are you wearing?" His fathers voice dripped with disgust.

"Clothes," was Gerard's sheepish, pathetic reply. God, why couldn't he just stand up for himself?

"Tacky leopard coat. You look like a fag." 

His words stung Gerard. Even if he did look like a 'fag', what was wrong with that? 

"You're such a sissy. I didn't raise a pussy," he spat. 

Gerard's face fell more. 

"Y'know, using women's bodies as an insult isn't very nice of you." 

"Yeah, well, it wasn't meant to be nice," he retorted, his tone mocking.

Gerard sighed and left the house without responding. No use in arguing with stone minded people, anyway. He strode toward the city. The brisk windchill made Gerard shiver, the breeze tickling his nose and cheeks. Spring was arriving late in New York this year. The sun was starting to set later, too, which was disappointing; not many people dared to do this job during the day- not in this area, at least. Nobody wanted to get caught whoring themselves out or buying a whore. It wasn't that big of a deal to him though. Desperation wasn't hard to come by around here. 

He rounded the corner onto Blackstone Avenue, the ultimate haven for prostitution and other various "minorly illegal" things. It was time to put his skills to work.

( ) ( ) ( )

Bartending sucked. 

Well, that's what Frank Iero thought. He didn't think anyone necessarily enjoyed cleaning up the vomit of seven different people within a span of two hours and arguing with wasted people every goddamn night. Earlier, it had gotten to the point where he genuinely considered taking a swig of a customer's beer when their back was turned. He had really tried his best to stay positive. He'd kept repeating to himself throughout his shift, 'Stay positive, stay positive, stay positive, be a good influence on these people, and for god's sake, don't be a pissy little bitch'. But alas, one can only take so much, and when some wasted college kid flung himself into a glass liquor cabinet, the kid lost his pride, and Frank lost his goddamn mind. 

There was wine and blood absolutely everywhere. The place looked like someone had just been exorcised and then slaughtered in it. The kid definitely looked the part. Frank figured he probably would've jumped to that conclusion, too, if he hadn't just saw it all happen. His boss had told him to just take the rest of the evening off and that he would call in medics for the wasted kid and cleaning service to handle the horrid mess- he would just close rhe place early. Relief and pure gratefulness washed over him at sound of that. He'd asked if he needed to stick around in cause something happened with the kid, but his boss said he had it under control, and told Frank to just go home. Frank didn't need to be told again.

( ) ( ) ( )

It was four A.M. Money was abounding. And so was Gerard's desire to sleep. Traffic was slow the first few hours, so he made sure to make up for the lack of business by staying out a couple hours later than he'd originally intended to. Part of that, though, was that the first guy that bought services took what seemed like an eternity to finish. Most guys were just looking for a quick, discrete fuck- which Gerard very much appreciated the "quick" and "discrete" part.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> once again, this is not a real chapter. this is just my makeshift way of saving drafts to add on to to post properly later :D


End file.
